That Impossible Dream

Fuck Blogger

2010-10-22T23:25:00.000-07:00

Get on that Tumblr hype.

http://thatimpossibledream.tumblr.com/

A Quickie

2010-09-23T17:33:00.000-07:00

-I've been liking Kanye's GOOD Friday output. "Monster" is my favorite so far. And the video for "Power" and its remix have made me come around on the song. On the flip side, towards the end "Lord Lord Lord" gets a little self-indulgent on the singers' part for my tastes.

-"I Need You" is currently my favorite Beatles track.

-I recently realized that I have remarkably high self-esteem for someone who has done essentially nothing with his life. I think I'm proud of that.

-Here's a few quick reviews of the last 4 movies I've seen:

Easy A - 6/10
I want to see Emma Stone in more stuff, but this movie didn't do it for me. It's probably because it was made for 15 year old girls.

Brain Damage - 7.5/10
Fuckdiculous.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World - 9/10
In the theater I went to, the screen was slightly blurry, and only the speaker above the screen worked, but I still loved the movie. If the theater I was in wasn't so shitty, I probably would have gotten hard.

The Other Guys - 8/10
If you don't like Will Ferrell, this won't change your mind. I do like Will Ferrell though, so this movie worked for me. I felt like Mark Wahlberg pulled his comedic weight too.

-I recently named one of my fantasy football teams "The Friendly Smile Brigade." I felt that more people should know that.

That is all.

Fruit Opinions

2010-08-06T03:49:00.000-07:00

I've had 25 years and 10 months to contemplate fruit. Here are my findings:

Apples - Great
Unless it's a Red Delicious or a Green, then you've got to take it on a case by case basis. Get a Fuji in your life, man.

Pears - Good
Only Bartletts though. I'm weary of those other kinds, like an old white man who sees a black family moving in down the street.

Bananas - BOSS shit!
Overshadowed and underrated.

Oranges - Okay
I don't really dig on citrus, unless it's just the juice.

Peaches - Good
I can rarely find a ripe one, but when I do...that's whassup.

Grapes - Good
Seedless reds are the King Koopa to the seeded greens Goomba.

Pineapple - Great
You rarely go wrong with pineapple.

Melon Rankings:
Watermelon>>>Honeydew>Cantaloupe

And there you have it.

Blog Classics: The Greatness that is CHEATERS

2010-06-24T20:25:00.000-07:00

I recently came to the conclusion that I am my biggest fan. I imagine that no one has read or liked the stuff I've written more than I do. So with that, I'm starting a regular feature that showcases what I believe to be my greatest works. Welcome to blog classics.

First up: a blog I wrote for my now defunct livejournal. My livejournal was my first foray into internet blogging and as such I fell into a few of the pitfalls that other shitty bloggers fall into. I'd post a lot about my weekends, even if nothing noteworthy had happened. My grammar was pretty bad. And I'd post more inside jokes than I would now. (sidenote: I hate when people post status updates that don't make sense, then write "insider" at the end. Why the fuck would you even post it for everyone to read then?) Below is the link to my old livejournal. If you decide you want to leave a comment there, don't because I'll probably never see it.

http://hityourkids.livejournal.com/

Anyways, this blog entry is about my love for the show Cheaters. A love that has waned over the years, but still burns somewhere deep inside me.

Originally published: March 9th, 2004

Current mood:	good
Current music:	Maroon 5 - This Love

The Greatness that is CHEATERS

I'm at my computer right now and Elimidate is on in the background. I don't really like this show, but the dude dating all the chicks just said something that made me laugh. So here it goes:

"Cecily just told me that she broke up with her last boyfriend because he slept with her mom. And that got me thinkin', "What's yo Mom look like?"

Now I'm no Elimidate expert, but that let me know immediately that Cecily was gone. I mean, once a guy is thinking about your mom, it's pretty much over. Fountains of Wayne taught me that lesson. So after the commercial, Michael makes his first elimination and Sho' Nuff it's Cecily.

Anyway, this show is fun if you want to see girls ranging from "eww" to "kinda hot" act like slutty bitches or if you want to see guys (usually a bunch of nerdy guys, but at least one jock) act like overconfident assholes. But sadly, that isn't my type of show.

So that show got me thinking about what, in my opinion, is the GREATEST syndicated reality show. That shows name is Cheaters.

In this show, a man or woman allows a camera crew to follow around their significant other for a week to see if they're cheating. What's great about this show is that the person HAS to be cheating because it's the title of the show. If they weren't cheating, the show would be called Faithful Couples and it would be canceled 20 minutes into the first episode.
So anyway, after the week is over, the host goes back to the dude (or lady) being cheated on and shows him the evidence gathered on a portable video camera. Then the show sets up a confrontation.

The first great thing about the confrontation:

It's always in public.
So the cheating girlfriend could be at a supermarket, a bar, the Gap, it doesn't matter, because she's 'bouts to be confronted. The confrontation then goes down and it always starts with either "Who's this?" or "I thought you loved me?" The confrontation then begins to either flare up (yay) or calm down (boo, turn the channel).
If it begins to calm down, don't worry, there's our savior. That brings us to the second great thing about the confrontation:

The Host begins to HELLA INSTIGATE.
He starts saying things he got from the evidence collection phase like "I thought you said you loved him. If you really loved him, why would you tell him you have to work late when you really went to the park to have sex with him (points to dude she was cheating with)" or "How could you do this, he's at home with your kids while you're out with him." At that point the boring confrontation becomes the heated confrontation, which is great.

There are a few times when the confrontation isn't in public, but those confrontations usually happen while the cheater is having sex. One time, the cameras popped into an apartment and the cheating girlfriend was handcuffed to her bed and a dude in clown makeup was banging her and clown music was playing on their stereo. The clown immediately fled and the confrontation started. 3 minutes into the confrontation a chick in panties and an orange highway cleanup crew vest busts out of the closet followed by a dude in his boxers and a knights helmet. They also immediately flee, wearing nothing but what I've described. BEST EPISODE EVER!!!

Thanks to the drama and the wackiness of the show the show gets a 4 star rating from me. You should watch it

That's It
Isaiah

The New Thing: Chubby Checker

2010-06-12T01:21:00.000-07:00

I'm about to let you in on The New Thing going around that's about to sweep the nation.* You're going to want to get in on this on the ground floor, because if you start doing this once it goes mainstream, you're going to be so streets behind in the eyes of everyone. Even your pastor.

The New Thing (#1): Chubby Checker
So say you're at a party/dance club/bar with a jukebox and you feel like dancing, but you don't know the song playing and you don't know what dance you should do. WHAT DO YOU DO! Well, calm down, I'll tell you. As soon as a new song that you've never heard before starts playing, shout out, "Oh shit! Is this that new Chubby Checker!?!" and start doing the Twist. And I promise you, soon thereafter, you'll be getting the finest girl in the room pregnant. You're welcome.

(Note: For this to have its full effect you must be earnest in your Twisting, and you must smile like you're in the early 60s dancing with your best gal, before the hippies ruined America.)

*This is not going around and will not be sweeping the nation

This has nothing to do with anything: No racist, but whenever I click a Twitter trending topic I'm always surprised by how many black people have Twitter accounts. The idea of Twitter seems like something that would only appeal to white, teenage girls.

The Fermi Paradox

2010-06-02T02:28:00.000-07:00

I'm interested in space exploration, aliens and the expansiveness (it's a word, I looked it up) of the universe. Weird as it sounds, I like learning about things that make life on Earth seem insignificant in the grand scheme of things (weird, right?). Anyways, I was surfing an internet message board and a user started talking about something called The Fermi Paradox.

"This is a good little read for anyone who's interested, I'll do my best to try and explain it.

To understand the Fermi Paradox first we need to understand the Drake Equation.

The Drake Equation defines a set of parameters that need to be fulfilled for intelligent life to exist somewhere else in the galaxy and then lets the user input their own percentages. (Such as percentage of stars that have planets, percentage of planets in a stars habitable zone, percentage of habitable planets that develop life, percentage of life that becomes intelligent etc.) Now astronomers all have differing opinions on what all of these percentages are, but the first number is the most important, number of stars in the milky way galaxy (somewhere around 200 billion). Using even the most conservative estimates in the Drake Equation you get an answer that intelligent civilizations have sprung up in the galaxy at least 5 times in the past. (The galaxy is believed to be 10 billion years old)

Assuming that a civilization developed interstellar travel capabilities, and traveled to another habitable planet where they set up a civilization and then sent 2 more ships to 2 different planets etc. then the civilization would colonize the galaxy at an exponential rate. Exponentially expanding, at most it would take the civilization 100 million years to explore the entire galaxy and set up outposts on every inhabitable planet. 100 million years may seem like an incredible amount of time, but in terms of the age of the galaxy (10 billion years old), and the age of the earth (4.6 billion years old) it is actually really not.

The Fermi Paradox asks, if there are 200 billion stars in the milky way, and even conservative estimates of the Drake Equation lead us to the conclusion that intelligent life has sprung up multiple times in the galaxy's history. Combined with the fact that a civilization could colonize the entire galaxy 100 times over based on the galaxies age vs. colonization time THEN... Why do we not see any evidence of any civilization besides our own?

-------------------------------------

Even though it seems like something out of science fiction, this is actually a serious scientific paradox. The first question would be do we not see evidence of other civilizations because they're not there? or do we not see them because our technology is not sufficiently advanced enough? Or maybe even because the Earth is being intentionally isolated.

It's perfectly reasonable to suggest that any civilization who has the technology for interstellar travel also has the technology to make incredibly destructive weapons. And maybe every single civilization that has arisen in the past has destroyed themselves before being able to begin to colonize the galaxy.

Maybe they are out there and we just don't know it. Try explaining a cell phone to someone who lived 200 years ago. It would probably be inconceivable for them to think you can talk to someone in China from a little box in your hand. And this is just 200 years, now talk about tens of millions of years of technological advancement. As Clarke's third law states: Any technology so sufficiently more advanced than a societies current technology would be indistinguishable from magic. It's really not all that inconceivable that we're surrounded by aliens right now and just don't know it.

Every single encounter in the history of Earth where one civilization was significantly more technologically advanced than another has resulted in the annihilation of a civilization. Maybe for that reason Earth is being kept intentionally isolated by a species that knows of our existence to prevent doing harm to our well-being or perhaps out of fear of their technology being used against them, similar to the way we refrain from interfering in the lives of native tribes in the amazon jungle because we know encountering them would result in their destruction.

Maybe there was a civilization that developed interstellar travel technology and for fear of safety from other potential civilizations that could be enemies built an army of robots to destroy any other forms of intelligent life. Maybe then that civilization died out but their robots still live on scanning the galaxy and have destroyed all other civilizations that have existed.

Or maybe, we don't see evidence of any other civilizations because they've never existed. Our estimates about the qualifications for life are just wrong and Earth is in fact the only place that life exists and has ever existed in the galaxy.

Anyway, it's really something to think about."

Source

Reading stuff like this makes my brain want to explode. I feel like Will Ferrell in Step Brothers after him and Mr. Reilly make their two beds into bunk beds, and his head starts spinning thinking about all the activities they can do with their new space. This is heavy, man.

Are there aliens out there that we can't perceive because to us their tech just looks like weird anomalies? Could we be boxed off by an alien civilization because they don't want to accidentally merc us? This is real heady stuff. It makes me want to write a really shitty sci-fi novel.

This has nothing to do with anything: That new Kanye track is kinda weak. And for the record, I'm a big Kanye fan.

A rant about fighting robots

2010-05-21T00:31:00.000-07:00

I've had a thought on my mind for a while. It's an inkling that I had while watching Transformers, realized when I watched Iron Man, confirmed when I watched Transformers 2, and something I decided I had to rant about after watching Iron Man 2. I HATE watching robots fight.

And I don't mean with weapons; I'll watch all types of robots go at each other with weapons. No, I'm talking about one-on-one robot fist fights. I don't ever want to see Iron Man, or a Decepticon, or an Autobot, or whoever the fuck else throw ineffective punch after ineffective punch at their equally matched opponent.

Now, I get why Iron Man would punch his opponents. He's a human being in a robo-suit, so understandably he would fight like a human. But why the fuck do Transformers, who according to their back-story are a species that have been at war for hundreds of years, punch each other? Their punches have little to no effect on each other. Essentially, their punches just knock their opponent back a little bit. It's the equivalent of a playful shove. And it's all wasted effort. No wonder they've been at war for so long,

The best hand-to-hand combat moment in either of the Transformers movies is when Megatron rips Jazz in two.

Artist Rendition

This was great for two reasons: 1) Jazz was a racist stereotype, and 2) It actually shows how a transformer would kill another transformer in hand-to-hand combat.

In the Iron Man movies, the best action sequences have been the ones where humans were fighting Iron Man. There's two reasons for this as well: 1) It eliminated the no consequences, CG character vs. CG character nonsense that spoils the Iron Man vs. main villain character in a robot suit fights. 2) You know that if Iron Man punches someone, they're going to FUCKING. DIE. Lethal consequences, they make movie fights great.

The way I've got it tallied, the two best action sequences of the Iron Man franchise are:
When Tony Stark uses the Mach 1 suit to escape the cave where he's being held hostage in Iron Man.

"Silly bitch. Your weapons cannot harm me."

And when Whiplash decides to fuck shit up in Monaco in Iron Man 2.

Mean-spirited caption about Mickey Rourke's face

Why were these fights the best? Because you knew that those poor cave dwellers and Whiplash were one good hit away from being a blob of fleshy red goo on the ground. In the case of the cave peeps, it was cathartic to see Iron Man take them down, so it worked. In the case of Whiplash, the movie had only been going on for 20 minutes, so the filmmakers had to find semi-creative ways to help Whiplash avoid death, thereby making the whole fight more interesting.

Contrast those with the end fight from Iron Man where Iron Man and Iron Monger were punching each other all over L.A. The guys inside the suits never felt like they were in any danger, so essentially it was like watching two guys fight in really expensive, high-tech sumo suits.

Sidenote: Tony built his sumo suit in a cave...with a box of scraps.

So in closing:

Makers of Transformers - Have more transformers rip each other in half, or give them guns like you gave Optimus Prime in Transformers 2. Also, bring back the hot Australian blond from the first movie, and have a CG Bernie Mac do one of his Def Comedy Jam routines.

Makers of Iron Man - More Iron Man vs. characters that aren't in giant robot suits please. Or just have him beat the shit out of the Hulk, because the Hulk is fucking terrible.

/rant

P.S. If you didn't get my sumo suit caption, click here.

Things I do that I wonder if other people do

2010-04-27T20:25:00.000-07:00

I was listening to a CD in my car the other day and "Temecula Sunrise" by Dirty Projectors started playing. As the intro was ending and right before the guy started singing, I asked aloud, "Hey dude, where do you live?" And then the lyrics kicked in with, "I live in a new construction home." I do this a lot when I'm in a car by myself, and less often when people are in the car with me. Then I got to thinking...there must be SOMEONE out there who entertains themselves by asking a question that's answered by the first lyric of the song they're listening to. Right? Guys...?

Anyway, I decided to make a list of slightly odd things that I do that I've been wondering if anyone else does.

-If I'm peeing in a regular toilet and I know someone is within earshot, I pee against the inner wall of the toilet as opposed to the pool of water at the bottom. I don't like people hearing me pee.

-I curse the accomplishments of anyone younger than me.

-When I see a sex scene on a TV show or in a movie I like to make comments that make it seem like I think the actors are really copulating ("fucking" in layman's terms). For example: I saw The 40-Year Old Virgin recently and when Andy finally bangs his new wife at the end I said "I think I see penetration."

-I don't like talking on the phone in front of other people. To that end, I almost never have phone conversations in public or while in a car with other passengers.

-I sing the Happy Birthday song twice to myself when I wash my hands in public*. I saw it in a commercial and apparently it makes sure that you're washing your hands for an adequate amount of time.
*I only do it in public because I like giving off a weirdo vibe.

-I like to play a game in hospitals or hotels called "Is it mounted?" Basically, the game is me going up to paintings in lobbies, rooms, or hallways, grabbing them on both sides, and shifting them left and right to see if they're mounted to the wall. (sidenote: I've only once encountered a painting that wasn't mounted; it was in a room at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. Tacky, tacky.)

So that's me. Feel free to leave anything weird that you do in the comments section.

This has nothing to do with anything: I miss the old Simpsons.

Team Isaiah Week 8 Wrap-Up

2010-03-29T18:19:00.000-07:00

Short post this week.

This was a BAD week for me, diet wise. This week I had birthday (not mine) lunches, birthday dinners, and road trip food to deal with, so instead of my usual "Moments in Fat Assery" I'll just post my "Moments in Non-Fat Assery" because that list is much shorter.

I've moved my workouts to Monday-Wednesday-Friday to coincide with my new Tuesday-Thursday class schedule. On Monday, I worked out, it must not have been too hard because I barely recall it.

On Wednesday, I tried the Spartacus workout that I read about in Men's Health. In the workout, you do 10 different exercises that workout different parts of your body for 1 minute each with a 15 second rest period between exercises. This workout BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ME. I did maybe six of the exercises with good form, and half assed the last four. You're supposed to do the circuit of 10 exercises 3 times, but I was done after 1. My legs, which I never strength train, were killing me for 3 days. It was awesome.

On Friday, I was on the road driving through shit-ass Fresno on my way to Long Beach for thee weekend. So no workouts for Friday or the rest of the week.

So in summation:

Week 8 Workouts
Monday - Probably something similar to my other workouts
Wednesday - 1 circuit of the Spartacus workout

Week 8 Moments in Non-Fat Assery
I had some strawberries on Thursday
I had an apple at a breakfast buffet

Team Isaiah Week 7 Wrap-Up

2010-03-22T05:45:00.000-07:00

If you recall, I ended last week by missing a workout. Well I was determined to right that on Sunday, but before doing so, me and J.H. Faapouli went to Nation's. I had their Wild Salmon Burger and two orders of fries because I was hella hungry.

It was great. I then harnessed the power of that majestic fish and those wondrous potatoes directly into my workout.

This was my Finals week and I didn't have any papers or presentations due, so it was pretty easy to fit in my Tuesday and Thursday workouts.

On Friday, me and J.Huber F. went to the Los Cerros on Richmond Parkway and I had a burrito and some flautas. I was so hungry that I forgot to take a picture of my food before I had killed the flautas and half my burrito.

That shit was crackin'. And if you don't follow me on Twitter, the bathroom there has the best sink I've ever seen in my life.

That night my older brother Josh brought over my little cousin Jericho (Missile) and they called me and Miah to come workout with them. So, on March 19th, A FULL 7 WEEKS INTO THE COMPETITION, Team Richmond (Josh, Jeremiah H. F., and Mighty Zay) had their first ever team workout session. It was a site to be seen.

On Saturday morning, me, my dad, and J.H.F. had to go tend the yard by the church, so on the way there we stopped at McDonalds and got breakfast.

It was fantas-great. And since I worked out on Friday, I didn't have to do it on Saturday. So all in all, it was a very productive week. Team HIIT, you better get your sHIIT together.

Week 7 Workouts
Sunday - Chest (5 sets bench press, 3 sets dumbbell press), Biceps (3 sets concentration curls, 3 sets standing dumbbell curls), Shoulders (6 sets shoulder shrugs), Abs (100 crunches on an exercise ball, 3 sets of leg lifts), Cardio (2 miles on the treadmill)

Tuesday - Biceps (3 sets concentration curls, 3 sets standing dumbbell curls), Triceps (3 sets triceps extensions), Back (3 sets dumbbell rows) Shoulders (6 sets shoulder shrugs), Abs (175 crunches on an exercise ball), Cardio (2 miles on the treadmill)

Thursday - Cardio (3.25 miles on the treadmill)

Friday - Biceps (3 set of standing barbell curls), Back (3 sets barbell rows), Shoulders (3 sets barbell military press, 3 sets shoulder shrugs), Legs (1 set goblet squats)

Week 7 Moments in Fat Assery
Nation's Wild Salmon Burger with 2 orders of Fries
Los Cerros Flautas and Regular Grilled Chicken Burrito
McDonald's Sausage Egg McGriddle meal and a Sausage McMuffin

Some thoughts

2010-03-20T00:03:00.000-07:00

Here's a rundown of some thoughts that have been running through my head lately...

-Ever since I saw Funny People, I've been thinking that I could probably write a 5 minute stand up set. Not perform it, because Jeepers Creepers do I hate reciting stuff that I wrote. Anyway, I'm gonna try to write five minutes of stuff and post it here at some point. It should be pretty brutal (in a bad way).

-Young Vanna White was hot.

-I was already pumped for the MacGruber movie (out May 21st). Then I saw this picture, and since I'm a closet pro wrestling fan, I am now super pumped. That's Chris effing Jericho! He's the best in the world at what he does. I think I want to see this more than Iron Man 2.

-If you're keeping track, here's my most anticipated summer movies:
1. MacGruber
2. Iron Man 2
3. The Last Airbender
4. Toy Story 3
5. Inception

-I was driving to one of my night classes the other day and there was a 90s era station wagon driving in front of me that looked kind of like this:

While I was driving behind the station wagon, I noticed a 40-something woman sitting in the trunk. I tried to get a better look at the others passengers in the car and I noticed they were all adults and all 30+ years old. And that got me thinking: If you're 40, and you're sitting in the trunk of a station wagon because there were too many other people in the car, your life has not gone like you planned. I'm willing to guess the person in the trunk had at least one DUI. Hell, I bet there were at least 3 combined DUIs or vehicular manslaughters among the people in the car, because what group of 30+ year old adults roll 6 deep in a station wagon? Only one of those six adults owned a car? Unless they were robbing a bank or headed to a gang fight, I don't really see the reasoning. Silly asses.

-I've been feeling this Beastie Boys song lately. I think it's the beat.

That's it. Team Isaiah update Sunday (Spoilers: It's been a good week).

Team Isaiah Week 6 Wrap-Up

2010-03-14T17:15:00.000-07:00

I'm in the midst of a weight loss competition with my cousins in Las Vegas, led by Samoan-Ninja. It's supposed to be a team effort, but I'm lone wolfing it on my end. Ninja has kept weekly updates on his team's progress, so I've decided to do the same. I started a week after they did, so here is my week 6 update.

I workout on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Ninja just got a job, so he wasn't able to do his workout routine this week. Lucky for me because I had a shitstorm of tests, assignments and presentations on Wednesday, so I missed my Tuesday workout.

On Thursday, I decided that since Ninja wasn't working out this week, I'd level the playing field before I worked out by going to a Chinese buffet.

I followed that up with one of my super sexy workouts.

On Friday, I really wanted a burger so I went to A&W's in Richmond. It was like a bootleg, more expensive In-N-Out, with not-as-good burgers, but better fries.

That sort of fucked up my diet.

On Saturday, I had to start studying for finals and I had to do a wash because I was out of clean clothes, so I ran out of time to workout. :(

So, in summary...

Week 6 Workout:
Tuesday - No Workout
Thursday - Biceps, Triceps, Shoulders, and 30 min. of Cardio
Saturday - No Workout

Week 6 Moments in Fat Assery:
Chinese Buffet
Original Papa Burger meal at A&W's

Fin

Come on America!

2010-02-27T01:21:00.000-08:00

I was having a conversation with a friend of mine recently and somehow the conversation moved to us talking about AIDS. He started talking about how he wears protection with his girl because he didn't want them to get AIDS. I asked him if his girlfriend had AIDS and he said, "No." Then I asked him if he had AIDS and he said, "No." THEN I asked him if he thought the two of them together could somehow create AIDS, and he was like, "Um, I dunno." I then went on to explain that "No. Two people who don't have AIDS cannot create AIDS. You should still wrap it up though."

Dude is in his early twenties. America needs to step it's sex-ed game up. Cut it out with that abstinence only shit. There's too many pregnant teens and people who don't know how people get STDs for my liking.

That's it.

This has nothing to do with anything: If you had told me in 2003 that in 2009 Conan O'Brien would get The Tonight Show, I would have been like, "Cool beans." If you would have then told me that it would be canceled in 2010, BEFORE Scrubs, which would be in its 9th season, its 2nd on ABC, I would have been like, "Fuck off, you liar." Eat a dick, Jay Leno.

Music (now with pictures and links and shit)

2010-02-10T23:03:00.000-08:00

I've been listening to albums that I've been meaning to listen to for a while now. I've been playing Please Please Me and Sgt, Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band in my car all week. I liked Please Please Me better on first listen, but SP's LHCB has since surpassed it.

Before that, I was listening to Till the Casket Drops by The Clipse. That whole album slaps to some degree, but I only really like 4 or 5 of the 13 tracks.

I also picked up that new Vampire Weekend recently. I like it. I liked the first album too, if you wanted my opinion on that.

Lastly, after reading a bunch of "Best of the Decade" lists, I realized that I've slept on Radiohead's Amnesiac and Kid A for too long. I listened to Amnesiac and it's good. Haven't listened to Kid A yet. I think I'll have to listen to both a bunch of times before I can rate them; It took me a while to really enjoy OK Computer.

If you're in a listening/downloading mood, here are my favorite tracks off of the above albums:

The Beatles

I Saw Her Standing There
Anna (Go to Him)
Please Please Me
There's A Place

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts (intro)
With A Little Help From My Friends
Fixing A Hole
Lovely Rita
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts (outro)
A Day in the Life

The Clipse

Kinda Like a Big Deal
Doorman
Never Will it Stop

Vampire Weekend

Holiday
Taxi Cab
Cousins

Radiohead

Packt Like Sardines in a Crushd Tin Box
Pyramid Song
Knives Out
Hunting Bears

And that's my music post.

This has nothing to do with anything: When you're dreaming, do you ever dream up shitty episodes of your favorite shows? I dreamed up a bunch of crappy episodes of Arrested Development when it was still around. Lately, I've had dreams about terrible episodes of Lost and 30 Rock.

This post is all over the place.

2010-01-20T02:15:00.001-08:00

It's been a while.

-Liam Neeson looks like Vince McMahon in this A-Team promo shot.

-In other "Guys in that A-Team Promo Pic" news, I saw District 9 and it was awesome great (8.5).

-In other "Guys that look like wrestlers" news, (Seattle Seahawks WR) T.J. Houshmandzadeh looks like The Great Khali.

-I miss Conan already.

-I'd like to thank my younger brother for putting me on to this wonderful music video. I like that it's basically a fuck tutorial. I also like that no one in the video is attractive. 2:06-2:14 is my favorite.

-I got a Netflix account. I think I'm finally gonna see what all the fuss about "The Wire" is about.

-Mass Effect 2 is the business. In Mass Effect, I customized my character's look and he ended up looking like a Filipino/Mexican with acne scarring. I changed his look for Mass Effect 2 and now he kinda looks like a white guy in blackface dressed up as Simon Phoenix.

That's about it. I have a music post coming up, look out for that. In the meantime, I've gotta go work out. I need to lose a shit ton of weight before July so I can laugh at my cousins from Las Vegas. I hope you Vegas folkers are reading this.

Movie Reviews

2009-12-29T19:47:00.000-08:00

I've seen a couple movies over the past month or so. Here's what I thought of them:

Ninja Assassin
Suck. There's an ultra-violent opening scene and the rest of the movie fails to live up to the promise of that opening scene. The look of the movie is really dark because that's how ninjas move around undetected, so it's hard to make out what's going on at some points. Plus, the lack of light made me sleepy.
Rating: 5.5/10

2012
It's fun for what it is. I enjoyed it like I enjoyed Independence Day. My favorite part was trying to pinpoint the exact moment in the movie that me and my family would have died in the destruction. I don't think we made it to the halfway point.
Rating: 7/10

Disney's A Christmas Carol
Kind of boring. They try to speak in 1700s(?)-era English, so some of the dialogue floated gently over my head. Also, the film never explains why Scrooge goes from a normal, young man to an obsessively thrifty, middle-aged man; it kind of just happens. That being said, I always enjoy the point in any version of "A Christmas Carol" where the Scrooge character begins to enjoy life again, so this movie ended on a high note at least.
Rating: 7/10

Fantastic Mr. Fox
Great shit.
Rating: 9/10 (may go higher after a repeat viewing)

Avatar
It looks damn good. I kind of want to see it again just to watch 2 or 3 scenes. But I won't, because the only fascinating character in this fairly boring film is the cartoonily evil Colonel character. And he's not even that fascinating a character. The lead lacks charisma, ditto the leading lady, and the story isn't interesting enough for me to overlook that fact.
Rating: 6.5/10

That's it.

This has nothing to do with anything: Vernon Davis, Patrick Willis, and Andy Lee are going to the Pro Bowl. Suck it lesser players at those positions!

I come out the gates swinging

2009-12-05T00:07:00.001-08:00

I had a dream during the summer. In the dream there's a sexy lobbyist and she's dealing with some congressmen. The lobbyist and the congressmen go off to a hotel room to (one can assume) engage each other sexually. The lobbyist changes in to some sexy lingerie and the chubby congressmen are ready to get down. These congressmen get their jollies by beating up women, so they tie the lobbyist (who is totally cool with this) to a chair. Then they start punching the fuck out of her face. Eventually her face starts bruising, but she never asks them to stop. Then her eye pops out. (I repeat. Her... Eye... Pops... Out.) The congressmen don't seem to care and are laughing throughout the beating and the lobbyist is all calm and cool about it. Then chunks of her skin start flying off her face and eventually her head becomes just a skull with patches of blond hair on top.

I woke up after that and thought, HOW THE FUCK DID I COME UP WITH THAT? I mean, it was my dream, so I imagined that shit. What the hell? And when did my dreams start becoming vaguely political? This adult shit is some bullshit.

Welcome to my new blog!
Isaiah